Summer O'Fun 2011 Days 8-17

It has been a good summer so far! We have had much nicer weather that we had all of last summer (although the past couple of days have been cool, overcast and a bit wet). Our 4th of July party was a lot of fun! We are still recovering (well, in the sense that the keg still needs to be returned to the brewery and we have a little fridge in our kitchen that needs to be moved to the laundry room).

I took the kids to the beach last week and they had a grand time although Dex insisted that he could apply his own sunscreen and ended up with a bad burn on his shoulders where he completely missed applying it. Ouch!

Dex has also started back at counseling because he had a bad few weeks. His anxiety levels were ok but it seems to be depression that is kicking his ass right now. It breaks my heart to see him so sad at times. I am sure he'll have to be on medication in the coming years. :(

Yesterday our Summer O'Fun included a 7:15am appointment with the orthodontist. The good news is that Dex does not need a palate expander after all though both he and Jax will probably need braces by next summer. The bad news is that Cars needed to start his treatment now and he'll get a palate expander later this month to help fix his cross-bite. He also has a severe overbite and needs braces now (as well as later) but his lateral incisors have not yet grown in so there is nothing to attach the wire to. In fact, the incisors have not moved at all since last year and the orthodontist things there is a change that they are impacted (maybe from the trauma of them being knocked out a year ago May?). Anyway, keeping my fingers crossed that they will eventually erupt on their own.

Today I took the kids to Seattle to Archie McPhee's. They had a good time poking through everything. In the end, Jax and Dex bought some "handerpants" and Cars bought a huge box of Kraft Dinner (empty box probably used as a promotional item). Whatever.

Summer O'Fun Day 7 (2011)

I had to stay indoors today as my face heals from the photodynamic therapy so I hired Babysitter to come and take the kids for the day. She is a wonderful babysitter. She first started helping out when we moved into our old house up the hill and she was 9 years old. She LOVED Jax (he was 15 months old). She would come over and play with him as often as she could. When Dex was born the following May, I hired her in the summer for $1/hour to be a mother's helper (her parents would not let me pay her more and I had to *insist* to them that I needed her to take the money).

Anyway, she babysat for us whenever we wanted to go out (which really wasn't that often). It was a sad day three years ago when she moved away to go to college. She is planning to become a teacher and she will be an excellent one!

Today she took the kids to see a movie, then out to lunch and then to the skate park while I huddled indoors and read, baked cookies and did laundry. It is a shame that I could not go out because it really was a lovely day - sunny and low 70s.

The redness and swelling in my face is nearly gone and it definitely does not hurt anymore. I have the ok to go outdoors in the morning. I get to repeat this again next month and in August. I still keep using the ointment on my face for 5 more months though and we'll see if it brings any more pre-cancerous cells to the surface.

Wear sunscreen!

Summer O'Fun Day 6 (2011)

I took the kids to buy stain for the deck (whoo-hoo!) and then we stopped at Half Price books so I could buy them some reading material for the summer. Dex and Jax moped around the store then said nothing appealed to them. Cars only found one book that he wanted. It is called "Fart". OMG At first I refused to consider buying it but then I relented. "Fart" is better than nothing, right?

I have also instituted a rule that there will be no xbox, wii, nintendo dsi, computer or tv between noon and 4pm. "What will we do?!" the kids wailed. I told them "something productive". Of course those 4 hours were painfully slow today but eventually they all found something to do. Dex and Cars pulled out the Thomas the Tank Engine train set that has not been played with in about 4+ years. It was fun to see them building the track - just like old times with Dex and Jax because they loved those wooden toys! Jax went to the skate park with his friend.

Afterwards, Jax asked me what I did during those 4 hours that was "productive" (he even used finger quotes). Let's see...I dropped his friend off after the skate park, I did laundry, I watered and weeded my vegetable garden. I also went through some of our 4th of July gear. I asked him if that were productive enough and he said he guessed so. Geez!

What I also did during that productive time (although I did not tell him this) was do a bit of research on Photodynamic Therapy which I had done on my face late this afternoon. It is a treatment for the pre-cancerous stuff on my face. I will tell you that nowhere did I read that it hurt as much as it does. Well, perhaps hurt is the wrong word. It stings! Like a bad sunburn which I guess makes sense because it was a serious of light pulses on my face. And I have to stay indoors and out of any direct light for 36 hours (I guess just 32 to go!). I have hired a babysitter for tomorrow so the kids will hopefully have an actual fun summer day.

And of course when I told Stephen that my face hurt he said "It's killing me!" yuk-yuk-yuk

Off to take some ibuprofen.

Summer O'Fun Day 5 (2011)

We went to the $300 Store today to buy supplies for the Fourth of July party. I know it was not the most thrilling day for the kids but they did get a slushee as a reward for helping out in the store. Then I made a meal for a friend who just had a baby (who is so little and sweet that I just want to eat her up!). Jax was going to go to the Farmer's Market to meet his friend at the skate park but the kid's mom changed her mind about going. Not a whole lot of fun for the kids today, I'm afraid.

Yesterday we went bowling though and we had fun. The kids were driving me a little bit nuts though (being super silly). We were the only ones at the bowling alley so their antics and noise seemed that much more amplified which made me less able to ignore it.

Afterwards I went to the eye doctor to check up on the corneal ulcer I had (have?). It is nearly cleared up but now I am on a different round of eye drops. I go back again next week to make sure it is all good.

Summer O'Fun Day 3 was tie-dyeing and for the first time ever our shirts did not turn out. Well, they turned out but we used dyes from two different kits and the dye from one kit ran all over and all of the shirts look muddy and ugly. So I bought a new kit today and we will redo shirts soon (need to run to Target to get more shirts).

I barely remember Summer O'Fun Day 1 & 2 but I am sure we did not do anything memorable. Gotta get on it to make sure we have more activities planned. Actually, just gotta get through to after our party on the 4th then then real Summer fun can begin.

Book List 2011

We are half way through the year and I have read a lot more so far this year than I have in previous years. I still need to step away from the computer a bit more.

Anyway, here is my list to date:

1. The Art of Racing in the Rain, Garth Stein *also read previously
2. The Book Thief, Markus Zusak
3. Rough Country, John Sandford
4. Name of the Wind, Patrick Rothfuss *also read previously
5. Wise Man’s Fear, Patrick Rothfuss
6. Little Bee: A Novel, Chris Cleave
7. The People Code, Taylor Hartman
8. Middlesex, Jeffery Eugenides
9. Miss Bossypants, Tina Fey
10. The Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy, Douglas Adams
11. The Sweetness at the Bottom of the Pie, Alan Bradley
12. Replay, Ken Grimwood
13. The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo, Stieg Larsson
14. The Girl who Played with Fire, Stieg Larsson

Since I have hit 14 so far, I will set a goal of 30 books this year. Geez, I remember when I used to read a book a day (in lieu of homework, tv and way before computers and children).

Hurray for Me!

Today I walked (and ran a very tiny bit) the Seattle Rock'N'Roll Half-Marathon. I have blisters on the soles of my feet and my hips are very sore but I managed to make it through the 13.1 miles. I am very proud of this accomplishment, especially since lately I have not been feeling very fit and haven't been particularly active. I even feel like signing up for another race, although I think I will do a 5K rather than another 1/2 Marathon.

Miss Melanoma

After I went to the dermatologist and found out that I had a pre-cancerous spot on my face, I wrote a little thank you to the hospital for holding the free skin cancer screening, telling them that the dermatologist I saw there recommended that I followed up on two things and the two things were not "nothing" as I was hoping to hear. Anyway, a couple of weeks later, someone in the PR department of the hospital called me to chat and told me that she would like to shop a story around to the local press about the event and asked me if I would be willing to talk to the press. I explained that I didn't have cancer so maybe it would be better if they found someone who had it diagnosed after the screening. She said it would be fine and said she'd be in touch. Another week or so later she called and said that one of our local papers was interested in the story and she set up a time for a reporter to contact me.

The reporter called and the first thing she said was that she heard I found out that I had melanoma after going to the screening. I explained that I did not in fact have melanoma or any kind of cancer but a pre-cancerous spot on my face and a suspicious mole. We spoke for a few minutes but I could tell that she really did not understand it all but I knew she would be talking to a dermatologist so no biggie.

A few days later they asked for a photo of me so I submitted my current facebook profile photo which was taken with my iPad so it is a low-res photo and my wrinkles disappear. :)

On Saturday morning as I was waiting at the plaza for my MIL to have her hair done, I saw a pile of newspapers so I picked one up (this is a free publication). There on the FRONT PAGE was a photo of me with the headline "Summer Sun: It's a killer" and under it (smaller headline "LocalCityName woman discovers she has melanoma after screening". WHAT!?!? No, I didn't and no I don't! I was horrified. I read the article and it was almost nonsensical. It did say that what I had removed was "non-cancerous" which is in direct conflict with the headline. I was so embarrassed and wanted to snatch up all of the papers that I could find to throw into the recycling bin. I am even blushing a little bit right now as I type this out.

Stephen thought it was funny and has taken to call me Miss Melanoma. :\

Fortunately, as it is a free paper, not a lot of people read it and I have had only one friend contact me about it. My hope is that no one else that I know has read it or will read it. Just three more days until the next edition comes out and this current one disappears forever.

Blathering on...

School is *almost* out for summer. The kids' school year was extended due to some snow days. So instead of getting out on June 16th, they get out in two days - June 22nd. But the last two days are 1/2 days. I am not sure why they didn't just lump them into one day and get out on the 21st.

Now if only summer weather would arrive we'd be golden.

We haven't one single summer thing scheduled this year. My traditional first day of summer tie-dye making day will not take place the first day after school gets out because I have a few things to do that day. I will try to get out to get the boys white t-shirts by Friday and hopefully we will get it done then. I usually have a party and invite several friends but I really don't feel up to it this year. We'll see how I feel later in the week.

Oh, wait, we do have one thing scheduled for the summer. Our annual 4th of July party. This year I am holding a hat contest and there will be prizes for most Patriotic Hat and most Original Hat. I hope that the guests participate. Stephen thinks it is lame and that no one will want to do it. I hope he is wrong.

Hopefully we can get a short camping trip scheduled in as well as some other fun summer activities. I need the boys to work on their summer activity wish lists. Oh and I'd better hurry and check the low tide schedule. Sometimes the lowest tides are early in the summer. Going to the tidal pools is one of my favourite summer activities.

After nearly three years, I quit my guitar lessons today. I enjoyed it but lost interest in the past few months. And I rarely practiced. My instructor would tell me "That's ok! Practice here." Fine for him getting paid to listen to me practice but expen$ive practice.

Anyway, I can play quite a few songs, and two really well - "Maggie Mae" and "It's All Been Done" by the BNL. It is one of my very favourite songs and very Beatlesque. I can also pluck away at "Let it Be", "Brown Eyed Girl", "Fire and Rain", "It's All Your Fault", "Dead or Alive" and some parts of "Stairway to Heaven". It was great getting a refresher in reading notes and now I do bar chords on an acoustic guitar (initially, I had to switch to the electric when I was learning "Let it Be").

I just sat down at with my guitar and played a few songs and I am proud of how well I have done considering the lack of practice. I imagine how great I'd be if I'd had actually picked up my guitar every day for 15 minutes each day!

Normal Crazy

I hope that no one was offended that I entitled my last entry as Crazy. I know some people are offended when depressed or overly anxious people are called crazy. But that is what I consider myself. All of the thoughts (worst-case scenario stuff and the mind that just won't shut off) make me feel like I am crazy. And that means just not "normal". And some people don't like "normal" and feel that "typical" is a better word. However, when dealing with myself, I will use crazy and normal. If you don't like it, please move along.

I have felt much better since I posted the other day. I think it was just such a relief to say it all and get it out. Confession is good for the soul, right? I think just finally admitting that I am having issues again has been a big help for me to think more about what I need to do to deal with it. I am feeling some pressure though because school is ending in a few weeks and there is so much to be done in the meantime (wrapping up volunteer work, class parties, baseball, Cars' First Communion, my in-laws visiting) that it is overwhelming to think of the time I need to exercise, clean, and perhaps go see a counselor.

See how I put that one last? Shows the priority I am giving it. Gotta re-think that.

Crazy (again) after all these years

I posted an entry last week then promptly deleted it. It was about me and anxiety and depression. Not sure why I deleted it. I think it was because I just hated saying it out loud.

What I said out loud was that over the past few months I could feel myself slipping into a sort of depression. My anxiety ramped up and I have been spending hours at night imagining the worst things possible. That the rabbits in our garden will have destroyed our property so much that it will cost tens of thousands of dollars to fix. That the rabbits are rabid (do rabbits get rabies?). That spider season is almost here and I will never be able to spend anytime down in the family room because at any moment a gigantic spider will come racing at me. That the record rainfalls will destabilize our yard and the deck and front porch will collapse while the crawlspace fills up with water. That Jax will be a hunchback. That Dex will become addicted to drugs at an early age due to self-medicating while trying to deal with his own anxiety and depression. That Cars will develop skin cancer (he is my mole-y-est kid). That Stephen will drop dead of a heart attack and I will not remember to pay the bills. That I have a heart condition and will die of a heart attack after a couple of years of shuffling around attacked to an oxygen tank. That the earth will destroy itself with floods, earthquakes, tornadoes, cyclones (are they the same thing or are they like hurricanes?), hurricanes (but I never worried about the rapture cuz the guy who predicted it was just plain nuts).

All of these very irrational things. And I know they are irrational. And during the day they are so stupid and I wonder WTF I was doing even thinking these things. But it happens at night when I am trying to lay still and go to bed. I do not discuss them with Stephen because he just rolls his eyes at me and asks me why I cannot just be happy. I don't know why. I am always waiting for the shoe to drop. Always.

So, while I sit in bed and worry and fret I can feel my heart start to constrict and I am so *sure* that I have heart disease or clogged arteries or whatever.

I recognize that these are not the thoughts of a rational person.

I made an appointment to see my doctor for a physical. Well, I saw her nurse practitioner (I don't think I have even seen my doctor since Cars was an infant). Anyway, I went in and I just started spewing all of this stuff and I told her that I thought I was depressed or needed to get a hold of my anxiety and that I was sure I was having heart problems but I know I just feel it when I am stressed and blah blah blah blah!

Once she calmed me down, she asked me if I wanted to be medicated and I said no. Why? I had no idea why. I just didn't like the IDEA of it which is so stupid because if I had high cholesterol, I would take medication. If I had diabetes, I would take the medication. But because my brain chemistry is probably out of whack I will not do anything about it. Well, not entirely true. I just won't take medication for it. I will go to counseling and I did take a referral for that (but now school is almost out so when would I go and how long will it take and the office is not close and and and and...).

I kept wondering why I would not take medication. When I was diagnosed with PPD when Cars was 3 months old, my OB/GYN prescribed Zoloft. I promptly filled the prescription but never took one. I did start counseling and long time Blahg readers will remember that I went to Crazy Doctor for 2 years. I often wonder if I had taken Zoloft, would I have been happier, saner, more stable much sooner? Probably. Yet here I am, in almost the same place six years later and I will not take an anti-depressant.

I did call Killjoy (yes, that name is back) and told her what I had told the doctor. That I thought I was depressed. This was a big step for me to even tell my mom. To admit it out loud. (I mentioned something to Stephen last month but then we just shrugged it off). Anyway, Killjoy told me not to take any of that "crap" (medication) and that I would be better if I just went out and got a job. Niiiice. Thanks for the support.

Anyway, I did agree to take a prescription for anti-anxiety medication that I can take "as needed". My heart and arteries all sound find so she is sure that the chest pains I feel as I lay in bed stressing about the recession, war in Afghanistan, tornadoes in Missouri, flooding in Louisiana, nuclear reactor meltdown in Japan and starving in Africa and general health and well-being of my family is just from anxiety. My blood work should come back next week and if my thyroid levels are out of whack or my vitamin d are low, these could also be part of the reasons why I am feeling so blue. I am also having my cholesterol checked to make sure it is still fine (at night, I imagine that it is clogged with thick layers of plaque which is causing the pains in my chest).

In the meantime, I must force myself to get up and move about and go outside, go to the store, go to the gym, go go go... I have go to get better. I must.

Gardening

For at least the second year in a row, we have had a very cool, wet, wet spring and it has been horribly depressing. Virtually no sunshine, no warm weather and just no fun. However, since Saturday, we have had 3 days of sun and tomorrow it will return along with a predicted high of 70 degrees F! I am delighted!!

I spent Saturday weeding and also cutting limbs off some of our trees. Yesterday, my neighbour gave me a small lilac bush that is an off shoot of hers and I planted it on the sunny side of our house. Lilacs are a little finicky here because we don't usually get cold enough temperatures that they need in the winter. Well, we didn't use to. We have had "cold" winters the past few years so I am hoping that this lilac bush will thrive and give off lots of sweet smelling blossoms next spring.

I also transplanted a Japanese maple bush that I purchased on clearance last fall and had hastily planted in the ground in November, pot and all! My neighbour (she is a master gardener) doesn't think the spot I chose for the maple will do well (too sunny and dry in the summer). I am hedging (ha!) on a summer like last year so a cool and wet summer will allow this maple to take root and do well.

Today, I planted a couple of zucchini plants. Hopefully they will do something and the darn bunnies will not get to them. We live in a very pest-riddled area with bunnies, deer, voles, moles, woodpeckers and other ilk! I hope to get some other veggies in the garden on the weekend (broccoli, tomatoes, and something else).

Anyway, I'll enjoy the sunshine while wearing SPF30 or 50 or 60 (depending on how long I will be out there). Don't forget to wear yours!

A few months ago, a small white spot appeared on my cheek. Great, another zit, I thought. However, it never got hard and sore and just stayed there looking white and flat and pretty noticeable (at least to me). I decided that I would have my doctor look at it at my next physical (scheduled for later this month). Then I saw that the local hosptial was having a free Skin Cancer Screening so I thought I would go because I have never been to a dermatologist (I just suffered with acne alone as a teen, fighting it with my Oxy-5). Oh, and I also have rosacea and my PCP prescribed some topical antibiotic ointment for it last year.

Anyway, I walked out of the Skin Cancer screening with a recommendation to see a dermatologist about the spot on my face and a couple of moles that were darker than the rest. Spy recommended her dermatologist to me and I got an appointment in no time. I went in and the dermatologist seemed to think the spot on my face was file - a "skin barnacle" she called it (Seborrheic Keratosis). One of the moles that the Skin Cancer screening dermatologist was concerned about was cut off as was the "skin barnacle". I have had to walk around for a week with a little round bandaid on my face that makes it look like I popped a huge pimple or something.


The dermatologist's office called back today and the mole on my arm was normal but slightly "atypical" (huh?!). So that means that I need to keep an eye on all of my moles from now on. The spot on my face was not Seborrheic Keratosis but Actinic Keratosis which is a slow growing and pre-cancerous. So, good thing I had it looked at. I have to go back for some sort of treatment next month after the rosacea in my face is "under control" (dermatologist's words).

Maybe it is a good thing that we live in the least sunniest place on the face of the earth. Ok, maybe not least sunniest but probably close! We all suffer from Vitamin D deficiency but still end up with pre-cancerous skin cells. How fair is that*?

(*ok, of course this condition took decades to build up and was a result of the many sunburns I received as a child and teen and young adult and long before I moved to the City of No Sun).

And people, please watch and share this PSA:

(of course this is about melanoma, which is not what I kind mine could have turned into, but still a good message)

I had a wonderful Mother's Day! My kids rock. My husband made the most delicious meal (teriyaki salmon grilled on a cedar plank and pan-fried scallops!). We played games, completed a puzzle. I listened to the kids play the guitar/bass and they played outside between rain showers. I spoke to my mom and MIL and admired the lovely bouquet of roses that were delivered on Friday.

I am so lucky to be a mom.

Fifteen Two

When my mom was here, she taught Dex how to play Cribbage. I was so excited because I love playing cards but Stephen doesn't like it much and the kids always played dumb whenever I tried to teach them ("I can't count to 15!"). Anyway, Dex was very willing to learn and he learned quickly. He won about 1/2 of the games that he played against my mom although I know that at least one she played the "wrong" card so she would not peg out before he counted his hand. Dex asked her many times to play and they had fun.

Since she left, I have asked him a half-dozen times to play and he always gives me a polite "no thanks". What?! I want to play Cribbage with a real person (not the computer or some Joe from Iowa who hates Obama - thank you for introducing us pogo.com).

I will keep at him. Mother's Day is coming up so I may start suggesting that a perfect gift would be a game or two of Cribbage.

Now I just need to get Jax interested in Scrabble or Cars in Gin Rummy and I will be a happy camper.

"Highlights" from April

It has so long since I updated so here are a few "highlights" from the month:

1. I am now the mother of a teenager! Jax turned 13. The days are long but the years are short.


2. My mom came for a visit and I did not feel like slitting my wrists. And she was here a week! I didn't even think to call her Killjoy once.


3. I have gained 8 pounds but it looks like 20. My pants do not fit and I look like the Michelin man. Must.do.something.now! (almost wrote soon <-- that's my problem - soon never comes!


4. I said NO (or just did not respond) to 8 additional volunteer requests in April. Of course the one extra one that I said YES to was the one that I completely forgot about (bringing in shredded cheese for the monthly teacher appreciation lunch - oops!


5. Went to the Skagit Valley Tulip Festival for the first time ever (I've only lived here 12 years). It was gorgeous!


6. Have finally bested the woodpecker!(covered the hole with hardware cloth and installed a deterrent.


7. Stayed up all night to watch the Royal Wedding and I am still tired

And that was my month. Hopefully this month will be more interesting and there will be more posts from me.

Migraine's Stink

Ugh - I have a wicked migraine today. It is almost gone thanks to Relpax. I am reluctant to take prescription drugs for these so I suffered most of the day with only Anacin before I caved. I don't know why I just didn't take Relpax hours ago as I'd be done with the migraine by now.

I have had migraines as long as I remember. I often complained about headaches as a child and my mother, whom I do love and like but who had very little patience for complainers, used to call me "George" after her father, the hypochondriac. Anyway, when I was about 15 I decided that I had to do something about the headaches so I went to the doctor (changed doctors on my own since I didn't like our family doctor). Now, I don't believe my migraines are hormone-related because I do not get them around my period. Some of my triggers are dehydration, stress, smelly perfumes, not eating frequently enough (rarely get them from this ;), Chinese food (probably from MSG), lack of sleep, and changes in the weather as well as sometimes the reason I get them are a mystery. I think today's migraine was brought to me by the weather change although today was a high pressure day not a low pressure day so who knows if that were it or not.

When I was in my late teens I went to a neurologist. I had an EEG where they stuck what looked like little push-pins attached to wires into my head. This was the pre-HIV/AIDS era because I am certain they use sticky electrodes rather than push-pin kind. I know those push-pin kind were reused too and I remember my cousin (who accompanied my to the visit as my parents were at work) was so grossed out when I came out with dozens of little bloody dots on my head. Anyway, the EEG showed normal brain movement and no signs of a tumour (whew!).

My migraines often were accompanied by visual disturbances. I recall the first time I experienced a visual disturbance before a migraine. I was a student and was working part-time in a movie theatre ticket box and I lost my peripheral vision. I only had vision right in the very centre for about 15 minutes and I was so scared that I was having a stroke. I had to hold the money people gave me out to the side to see if it were a $5, $10 or $20! As my vision came back, a crushing migraine came with it. I almost vomit ted in the ticket office! I had to run out and I threw up in the bathroom. I know exactly what my trigger was that time. My co-worker's perfume! It was called Ciara and she would douse herself in it. On top of that, she had this horrible rotten cheese body odour and to this day, if I smell Ciara I will retch.

It was a few years later I was working in a bank and I lose my centre vision and could only see out of the periphery. It was very interesting for that 20 minutes trying to check people's signatures and filling in bank forms when I had to hold the form off to the side and try to write while looking straight ahead. Again, when my vision returned, the mind-blowing pain came with it.

In the years since, I have had only a few more visual disturbances that signaled a migraine onset. Once it was like wavy lines, and another, it was like I was looking through a kaleidoscope. I have had the lost peripheral vision again too but now I know when visual disturbances happen 1) I am not having a stroke and 2) these migraines will be the worst!

I have also used different migraine medications over the years. One doctor had me on a daily medication to hopefully stop them from coming but I often forgot to take the medication. So often I would just suffer through them with a cold wash cloth on my head while lying absolutely still in a darkened room.

Then in 1992, a miracle! Imitrex was approved for use in Canada. It was the best drug ever for my migraines. I could take one tablet and within 10 minutes the pain would start to dissipate and within an hour (max!) the pain would be gone as well as the crushing pressure of the migraine. I would often get a migraine "hangover" with some slurred or thick speech and feel a little dopey. But I could actually stay at work with a migraine and the quality of my life improved.

Then in late '93, Stephen and I were married and I moved to the States. I had no medical insurance and even worse - no Imitrex! I found out that they were still doing clinical trials for Imitrex and that the tablet had not been approved for sale here yet. They did have the auto-injector though and I signed up with the manufacturer and was able to get Imitrex auto-injectors FREE. The problem was, have you ever tried to inject yourself while suffering from a migraine. I wasn't sure which was worse. The pain of the migraine or the anticipation of the pain from the injector (while it was no overly painful, the injector was definitely not pain-free!).

Anyway, finally the pill form was introduced here in the States (right about the time that I got health insurance) so I took Imitrex by tablet again although my insurance company would only prescribe 6 at a time.

I stopped taking Imitrex around the time that we decided to start a family and I will tell you that while I was pregnant, I was virtually migraine-free! This made me think for a while that the migraines could have been partially hormone-related but I think it was mostly because I was eating regularly and drinking tons of water, all the while reducing the stress in my life because I had gone into pre-term labour at 28 weeks which fortunately was stopped and I was put on bed rest.

Also, since moving to the Pacific Northwest in '99, I have had far fewer migraines. I think this is mostly to do with the weather. The oppressive, muggy, humid and suffocating summer weather in Minneapolis and Toronto were big migraine triggers for me. And in '04 when we went to Florida for a vacation, I had a migraine most of the 10 days that we were there. Ugh, who could live there?! I had to suffer without Imitrex that whole trip because I was nursing Cars and although I was told it was "safe", I refused to take it while pregnant and nursing any of my children.

A few years ago, my doctor's PA suggested that I try Relpax rather than Imitrex. It is in the same "triptan" class as Imitrex and it seems to work well for me (although not nearly as quickly). It does not give me the same feelings of heaviness and thickness in my chest and throat when I take it which I do like though so I give up one for the other.

Anyway, it has been two and a half hours since I have taken Relpax and the pain in my head is gone but I still have pressure. And I have a migraine "hangover". Stephen just texted me that his plane has landed (he went to Toronto to see his parents - his mom is going through cancer treatments) so I had better run and at least load the dishwasher from today's breakfast dishes. I might even be able to throw some dinner together for the kids (no promises at this point).

In the meantime, I am watching Dex and seeing that he is a migraine sufferer and I hurt for him because I know what it will mean for him for the rest of his life. (they do tend to run in the family - two aunts, my dad and my oldest brother all had/have them). Hopefully Dex won't have them as often or as badly as I do.

My brother posted this article to me on Facebook today:

Headaches might ease as you age

I guess I have that to look forward to.

Snow in April. Yes that is what we have. Snow in Seattle in April. Aargh! Ok, the snow did not cause any problems with traffic and fortunately school was not canceled (the school year has already been extended 4 days due to snow days). But today is COLD. And it is April and it should not be this cold. The forecast for today was originally 55F and sunny by the afternoon I do not see that happening. They are still claiming it might hit 50F today but it is already 11am, still cloudy and only 40F. Promises, promises.

Today, Jax starts his track after school. They practice everyday after school except for Wednesdays. Track actually started on Monday but he had conveniently forgotten to sign up for it. I had him get the forms from school on Monday then on Tuesday I had to take him to the doctor to have her sign the release form and since he had not been to see her since October 2009, he had to have a physical. All went well until she examined his spine. She kept telling him to bend over properly then she realized that he was and she left to get some device to measure his spine. Afterwards, she told us that kids often go through growth spurts and their spines look uneven (he is now officially taller than me, standing a whopping 5'6.75"!). His spine looks crooked she is not concerned enough to send him to a specialist yet but we do have to go back to see her in 6 months.

Of course, with my worst-case-scenario personality, I already have him in a Milwaukee brace and being made fun of in school. I remember in Grade 7 when JaniceM got a Milwaukee brace. Her pencil rolled off her desk and she got down on her knees to try to pick it up but she got stuck! She could not reach it and she could not get back up. A boy name Bruce started laughing and he could not stop. Then Janice started to cry. The rest of us in the class looked on in shock, going back and forth between Bruce and Janice. It seemed to go on forever but I am sure it was just a few seconds before the teacher intervened.

And of course there was the scene from "Sixteen Candles" where Joan Cusack's character, who is wearing the brace, tries to lean over to take a drink from the water fountain and she cannot. Also, in my high school, there were two more kids wearing that brace. One was a boy who was so very tall (and he also had braces on his teeth and very bad acne - gah!).

So, these are the kind of things I have already imagined for Jax and really at this point all we have is a "come back in six months". I want to know NOW if it is going to be a problem so I can get these images and thoughts out of my head. Jax has started getting blackheads and pimples and he is in the 95th percentile for height. OMG - exactly like that boy from my high school!

Breathe - breathe - breathe

Ok, I am calm for the moment. So, for the meantime, Jax will do track (in the snowy April weather) and work on his posture (he thinks she wants to see him again because he slouches). I'll keep the worrying to myself and research alternatives to the Milwaukee brace. And maybe get him some ProActiv.

Happy Birthday to me! Well, it was a few days ago. It was spring break so I decided that it was the perfect opportunity for the kids and I to go to the Seattle Art Museum (SAM). I had never been there before and kids 12 and under were free (and Jax turns 13 next month so let's go!).

We drove through the pouring rain (we had the worse spring break weather all week!) but it had stopped by the time we got downtown. I found the SAM then circled around blocks and blocks and blocks looking for parking. Street parking downtown is very limited and what is available has a 2 hour limit so I knew we needed to find a lot. I went to my old stand-by lot which is actually very close to the aquarium and a few blocks away but there was just one skinny little space available (the cars on either side were parked on the lines) and I knew that my SUV would not fit in there.

I went back and drove around looking for a parking ramp that could accommodate the height of my vehicle. Um, there are NONE. I did see that the height at the Westlake Center was listed as 11' some inches but once I drove down the ramp, that height is for delivery trucks only and the lower levels for passenger vehicles was only 6'4" (my car is slightly over 6'5"). Nooooo! The guy had to get out of the little booth and stop the cars coming down behind me to give me room to make a very awkward 85 point turn to get around and drive back up the ramp and out onto the street. I was sweating (and swearing) at this point. Aaargh! I should have switched cars with Stephen that day.

The kids and I drove even further away and I finally found a small lot that had some available spaces. Hurray! Well, once I checked the prices I found out why there were some available. I paid $24.95 (the cost of 4+ hours up to 24 hours)! The guy told me that he'd be needing the receipt back when I left. Um, I don't think so. It was my credit card receipt and while the cc number was not printed on there, I know that he was going to re-use my ticket and give it to someone who was going to pay cash (and he'd pocket the money).

So the kids and I now had about 12 blocks to walk back to the SAM. Usually not a problem but all three chose not to dress for the weather. It was not raining but it was windy. The chose to keep their rain coats in the car and were only wearing hoodies which the wind whipped straight through. They didn't complain (since it was my birthday) but they shivered all the way there.

It really did not take as long as I figured it might to get through the exhibits. I really enjoyed looking at all of the works of art. The kids were mostly bored but they pretended not to be and did behave. The only grief I got was from Cars demanding to know why it was part noon and he had not had lunch. ~eye roll~ That kid definitely is ruled by his very picky stomach.

After we went through the museum (it is not nearly as big as I had anticipated), we headed to the restaurant which is a little fancier than I expected. Dex had a $10 gourmet hot dog (minus all of the fixings that made it gourmet, of course). Cars was the only one to order off the kids' menu(again, 12 and under so we were under a timeline for Jax but he wanted an adult-size meal). ;)

We headed back outside and hiked our way back to the car, stopping at Nordstrom so I could buy some eye make-up (happy birthday to me). I went out the back entrance of the lot so the guy could not flag me down to get the receipt (heh).

Stephen came home early from work and he grilled burgers for us and we had a vanilla cake with chocolate icing that I had made the night before. It was a very lovely evening and end to a great day spent with my kids.

School starts back from break tomorrow. I feel a little ripped off since the weather was absolutely horrible all week but it is Seattle and it is spring time. I heard a rumour that there really is a sun behind those clouds. I hope we see it soon.

It's All Been Done

The favourite song that I like to play in my guitar is "It's All Been Done". I love the song plus it is relatively easy to play with just a few bar(or barre) chords. It is upbeat and fun and one song that I can play. I can also play "Maggie May" for the same reason (although I haven't mastered the intro).

I can also play a lot of little ditty songs by picking out the notes such as "Amazing Grace", "Lavender Blue", "The Star-Spangled Banner", and "The Jamaican Farewell Song".

I have been taking guitar lessons for 2 and a half years and that is all I can play. Oh sure, I can muddle my way (barely) through songs like "Fire and Rain", "Let it Be" and "Please Don't Leave Me" (although I did have to switch to an electric guitar for Let it Be and Please Don't Leave Me because the barre chords were killer on my fingers and wrists on the acoustic because the strings are so much harder).

I am not sure what I expected with guitar. Did I think I would be able to play like Nancy Wilson from Heart by now? I think my expectations were very unrealistic, never mind the fact that I do not practice nearly enough.

So here I am, at the crossroads - do I continue or do I quit? I am worried that if I quit I will never pick up my guitar again. And if I continue, I must commit myself to really practicing and spending more time just playing in general.

Tonight I practiced for about and hour. My fingers are almost bleeding and they are sore but it is a good kind of sore. Enough to know that I did practice and I know did have a bit of a breakthrough on one song. Let's hope I still feel the itch to play again tomorrow.

I cannot stop watching video and photos of the devastation in Japan after the 8.9 earthquake and tsunami. The aftershocks are high enough to be "real" earthquakes in their own right and enough to cause tsunamis as well. And the potential meltdown at the nuclear power plant is frightening. So much to deal with all at once.

I cannot do anything other than send money at this point. What I can do for me is to update my earthquake stuff. I never did put everything all in one place so I plan to buy some totes to do that. And I need to check all of the flashlight batteries and make sure we have enough water stored away. As I mentioned in a recent post, the 10th anniversary of the Nisqually earthquake just passed. And the big earthquakes in the past few weeks in New Zealand, China and Japan are finally nudging me to get this done.

And really we should always be prepared for any kind of emergency, right? Are you prepared?

3 days 3 ways
Are you ready?

March came in like a Lion

On March 2nd, we had a big wind storm blow in. It was early in the day (much better than the ones that come up at night). I was downstairs catching up on some tv shows ("Glee" and "Survivor") when I heard a huge clatter and bang. I ran up to check on my patio furniture (the wind storms have blown my table across the deck in the past and knocked over the chairs). The table was moved a bit, the umbrella shifted as well as the grill. I couldn't figure out what had made that big clatter but all looked ok out there so back downstairs I went to finish my shows.

When I was done, I headed up to have a shower and I saw a long line of wet on the carpet:

Shoot! My skylight was leaking from all the rain! I looked up to see if I could figure out where it was leaking and saw...


What?! No SKYLIGHT! I was staring right out at a bright sky (we were between showers at the moment). OMG, my skylight was gone! I ran back downstairs and out through the garage to see if I could find the skylight. It was in the front garden.



I guess it must have slid right down the roof and feel into the garden. It fell so hard that it flipped over that round paver under it. But, it did not break! There are plenty of scratches on the glass but I could not believe it had not broken.

Then I wondered how the hell I was going to get it back up where it belonged!

I kept trying to call Stephen but he was incommunicado. I called my friend, who is a realtor, and cried WHO DO I CALL?! She calmed me down and told me to call the contractor who had been doing work around the house for us. I did call him but he wasn't going to be available for hours. It wasn't raining at the moment and the sun was even starting to peek out so maybe I'd be ok until 2pm??

Then a car pulled up and my friend's husband got out. He had a ladder strapped to the roof of his car and a blue tarp. He climbed up on the roof and strapped the blue tarp over the whole in my roof! Hurray! And just in time because the skies were getting dark again.


Then he drove away. I picked up the phone to call my friend to thank her for sending her husband over and as I was dialing, it started to hail and I was so thankful that the blue tarp was up there! Then a huge whoof and the tarp blew away as I heard my friend answered the phone. I stood there dumbfounded as it started to hail in my house. OMG - it was hailing in my house! The hail lasted close to 10 minutes. Then the sky turned blue and up drove my friend's husband again. He climbed back up on the roof and tied the blue tarp on more securely.


This time, the blue tarp stayed on until the contractor arrived, even though the wind and rain started yet again.

The contractor arrived, installed the skylight and secured our other 3 skylights. Turns out when the house was re-roofed (not long before we moved in), the roofers did not secure the skylights when they reinstalled them. I guess we were lucky that it hadn't happened before and that the skylight did not actually break.

We had another storm today. Not nearly as windy but just as rainy. I was glad to know that the skylights were not going anywhere!

Tomorrow makes the 10th anniversary of the Nisqually Earthquake here in Washington State. It was the first earthquake that I ever felt and it was pretty big - 6.8 and lasted nearly 45 seconds.

It was late in the morning and I was still in my jammies. Jax was playing quietly nearby (I was reading my forums) and Dex was asleep on the couch. I heard a rumbling and thought it was a loud truck going by. The house started to shake too and I thought that it must be a really LARGE truck. Then I looked across the family room into the kitchen and I could see the house rolling and it clicked - EARTHQUAKE! I picked Jax up and ran under a doorway. I clearly wasn't thinking correctly because I left Dex sleeping on the couch! OMG! What kind of mother does that?!

When the house stopped rolling (it seemed to last forever but it was just about 45 seconds), I rushed back to Dex who did not even stir. Nevertheless, I picked him up and I was shaking a bit. For some reason I could not make calls but could take calls coming in. Stephen called to see if we were ok. He was pretty shaken up because he was in a taller building at work and could really feel the building sway.

There was no damage to our house or belongings with the exception that the top row of my PEZ collection fell down! Several others "danced around" and were facing the wrong direction. I am sure it wasn't worse because the cabinet was strapped to the wall.

Anyway, I have felt just one small one since that first BIG one but I did not realize it was an earthquake - I just thought the washing machine was too full and was shaking the house. I hope we don't have any others anytime soon. I look at the destruction of Christchurch in New Zealand with 145 dead and still a couple of hundred people missing, and I think about how lucky we were that the Nisqually Earthquake was deep in the ground (about 32 miles!) as it did not cause nearly the kind of damage that one at a much shallower depth would cause. And just to say, there definitely was some damage (google Nisqually earthquake images) but no casualties and not many injuries. We were so lucky.

So Happy Anniversary Nisqually Quake. Hope we never have to celebrate the anniversary a new quake.
Here's a photo of road damage (approximately 2.25 miles from me as the crow flies)

I worked in the health room at the school again today. I always get a kick out of the kids who come in there. Today we had 4 "head injuries" (kids bumped heads at recess), two kids with muddy clothes from falling in the snow at recess as well as a couple of belly aches.

One of the boys with a "head injury" insisted in lying on the bed with an ice pack on his head. Whenever I would turn my back to him, he'd let out a loud moan and would look away quickly when I turned back to him. I was concerned at first that he was really hurt until I spoke to his mom (protocol to call all parents when kids have hit any part of their head). She said with a heavy sigh that he had at least one "head injury" a month last year and it looked like this year he was on target for repeating that feat. He wasn't too keen on returning to class until the school secretary came in and sent him back. She told me jokingly that I needed to toughen up and send the kids back to class. I can't do it!

I have enjoyed volunteering in the health room this year. Some of the kids are so funny and some are a little sad. We see "frequent fliers" and some kids trying to be so tough when they are clearly hurt. I give clean clothes to kids who have fallen in the mud or peed their pants. They get a little pat on the shoulder with their bandaids and it is amazing how much better these kids can feel with an ice pack wrapped in a paper towel.

And when some of the 5th and 6th grade girls come in with stomach aches, I feel for them because I think some of them are probably experiencing their first menstrual cramps. I love the brave little boys who come in with blood streaming from their knees saying that "it doesn't even hurt!" while they wait patiently for me to put on my blue nitrile gloves (they finally replaced the latex gloves when I told them I had a sensitivity and wouldn't be able to continue to volunteer unless the blue gloves returned).

Anyway, I am only in their 2 days a month and it is a pretty easy volunteer gig. And much more interesting that photocopying (but not as fun as teaching Art Start). I am looking forward to my next shift.

Cars' teacher told me today that all of the girls are all ga-ga over him in class. She said that the hasn't done anything to encourage it but all of the girls fawn over him. Cars frequently gets chosen to help out the star of the day if it is a girl. He has been bringing home drawings that one girl at his table group has been making for him. Another girl just cannot wait to say HI to me when I come in the room then tell me all about what Cars has been up to.

He, I think, is oblivious to it. Well, oblivious to the fact that they are girls. Besides, he only has eyes for one girl - T. She was in his class last year and he is always telling me about what she did at recess. The other day he was eating an apple and was trying to get the little stem off. I told him he needed to hang on to it and twist it around and for every turn, you say A-B-C and whatever letter you are at when it pops off will be the first initial of the girl you will marry. When it popped off at D he told me that it should have been a T (!).

I'd better watch out for my son, the lady's man!

My family and I were approved today as "trusted travelers" so we will get NEXUS passes that will allow us in the super-fast no waiting lines at the border when we drive to Vancouver. Hurray! We still need to go to the Vancouver Airport (or Toronto next time we are there) to get the iris scanning done in order to use the NEXUS pass at Canadian airports. It will save us so much time when we travel to/from Toronto too! And it was only $50 for 5 years. Both Stephen and I had to pay the fee but it is free for kids aged 18 and under.

I almost want to drive up to Canada this weekend just to use it! And maybe we could consider day trips (well, still 3 hours driving each way but no wait at border will make it doable).

DH and I decided to upgrade a few things around the house. We had a builder-installed brass chandelier in the dining room (and matching pendant in the front hall) so we splurged and bought a new chandelier and pendant light. I was so delighted with them! The chandelier is much BIGGER and looks great! Plus the lights are halogen so really nice clean light (sorry, but I hate fluorescent lights!).

After we installed the chandelier I noticed that the dimmer switch would get HOT. In the past with the old light, I noticed it would get warm but this was HOT. I even brought over our instant read digital thermometer and the dimmer switch (which is metal), and it read 97 degrees!! Ouch!

So I looked online and after reassuring myself that my house was not going to burn down immediately, I realized that our light switch is probably a standard 600W while our chandelier is a 900W. Oops! Who knew? Anyway, we have ordered, through a contractor, a new light switch that he will install next week when it comes in.

The contractor has also installed 3 new bathroom sinks (the 4th will be installed next week), 3 new faucets, repaired our leaking shower, installed an electrical outlet outside the bathroom door (so we can use a night light and NOT keep the bathroom light on all.night.long). He is going to install a new kitchen sink and faucet as soon as the sink gets here (just ordered it - a Kohler Langlade "Smart Divide" in Caviar). He also installed a new security light at the side of the house which will make taking the garbage out much easier (it was PITCH black out there as neither the backdoor light nor the garage light reached the side of the house). He also ran the wire so we can install an overhead light in our bedroom. I am having a hard time finding exactly what I want though so he just had to cap off the box he installed and Stephen can install the light once we get it.

Now that we've started here there are so many more things that I would like to do. Long term (i.e. expen$ive) list and short term. Long term I'd love to install a gas fireplace insert in the living room, get a gas stove top (currently have a ceramic/glass one), hardwood floors in dining room, and the list goes on. Short term, I'd like to stain the deck and porch(in the summer), fix the lattice work around the deck (got broken digging for septic tank), and sew some new curtains for my kitchen.

If we keep at it all, we'll have a brand new house!

Mid-winter blues

I have found myself being pulled down into the darkness that comes with winters here - grey, overcast days. We have had the occasional day of sunshine which has been nice but overall, the weather is wet and it makes it hard to want to go out. As much as I am loathe to say it, at this point I would prefer to have some colder days with snow on the ground because at least the sun might shine a little more often. And really, I don't hate the snow as much as I proclaim. I just hate that our region is so ill-equipped to deal with it and everything comes to a screeching halt. When we were in Minnesota in November, there was a significant snowfall the night we arrived and through the next day. However, the day after that the main roads were bare and the side streets were very nicely plowed. I know it is unreasonable to expect that here due to the infrequency of major snowfalls, but it would make life easier.

I haven't been exercising as often as I should be and I have been carb-loading for no other reason than that carbs taste good! I had pasta last night with a butter/ sauteed onions/garlic sauce on it and it was so good. I was sad when it was all gone. And I have eaten at least one (Thomas Thin) bagel with cream cheese almost everyday for the past 2 weeks. With some cucumber slices - heaven! Carbs totally make me bloat, make me fat and make me lethargic (and are probably why I haven't felt like exercising). I need to eat some food that will energize me!

Well, time to take my Vitamin D and get on with my day. I might even make it to the gym today.

Besides voting in November, I did my first ACTIVE political move today. I have sent rote emails to political candidates before but today I called Rep. Dave Reichert's office. I called to let him know that I did not want him to vote to repeal the Affordable Care Act. Of course, as a Republican, he will vote for it but I felt that I had to let him know (well, his office) that I didn't want him to do that.

We'll see what happens. I honestly believe that universal healthcare creates a strong, healthy society which makes for a great society.

What's this all aboot?

My kids were making fun of my Canadian accent today. I barely have one left but there are certain words that my kids say I say "wrong". One is "Sorry" and the other is "Mom". Now, I pronounce Sorry the right way - Sore-eee instead of Saw-ree. Or Sow-ree. Either way it is WRONG.

And while I do write "Mom", I pronounce it "Mum" (as do virtually ALL Canadians) but my kids say MOM. It does irk me a bit and I have often, over the years, told them they are saying it wrong.

Of course there is also the ZED vs ZEE. I will admit that I have virtually Americanized myself into saying ZEE but it was only after Jax corrected me for the umpteenth time a couple of years ago that I finally conceded and decided to say ZEE. I do usually have to think about it though so when spelling things, I pause when I get to ZED...ZEE!

Anyway, the kids had a good laugh at me tonight. I told them that they would be made fun of if they moved to Canada for their accents (which really are not "bad" since they have grown up out here which is virtually accent-free). My nieces have a blend of southern (4 years in Florida) and midwestern (6 years in Illinois and 5 years in Minnesota/Wisconsin/Iowa) and sometimes it hurts my ears (sorry girls). Fortunately, their accents are just slight. Whew!

Cars redeemed himself and was able to earn back 2 of his evenings (he still went to bed right after dinner tonight).

Bad dentist appointment for him today too - 4 cavities! Yikes! They are all between his teeth and thankfully all are baby teeth. He has a bad gag reflex so I cannot floss for him (my fingers make him gag). I bought him flossers and he told me that he was using them but apparently not. And bad mom that I am, I do not supervise his tooth brushing. (he pushes so hard to be treated like his older brothers that sometimes it is just easier to do that and then things like this happen) :\ Anyway, it was an ordeal to get the x-rays today (took over 20 minutes) because he kept gagging on the bite-wing (are they still called that even though they don't look like that anymore and they are digital x-rays?).

So to get his teeth filled, they are going to have him take some nitrous oxide. I have never had it (I think because of the expense - it not covered by insurance). I also asked that he has his work done by the more experienced dentist. The other one who works there is nice enough but I think she is a little impatient with children. It was a little awkward to ask for Dr. N only and the receptionist said (a little too loud IMO), "DO YOU WANT ME TO FLAG IT SO YOU SEE DR. N ONLY?" I thought for sure that Dr. S was going to be walking around the corner to find out who the receptionist was talking to! Ack! Anyway, I said it was just for any restorative work for the kids that I want Dr. N. So we have to wait a month to get in to see her but that's ok.

In the meantime, Cars now gets a flossing supervisor every evening.

Where are the earplugs?

Cars is upstairs wailing away "Waaahhhhhhhhhhhhhh! Waaahhhhhhhhhhhhhh!" because I sent him to bed 30 minutes ago. He had had a fit when I told him it was shower time. He said "But *I* want to go last" (Jax was just getting out). I told him that he did not have that option tonight and he immediately threw himself down on the floor and said NO! Geez, is he like 2?! (he is in fact 7). He refused to get up so now for the next three nights he will go to bed right after dinner. And, he will go to school stinky tomorrow because he did not have a shower.

Cars the stubborn streak in him is admirable because he does not easily cave to pressure from his older brothers. However, the stubbornness is sometimes too much and the word compromise is not in his vocabulary. It is so frustrating when he digs his heels in, especially when it is over something like this - refusing to go for a shower so he ends up in bed with the lights off at 7:15pm.

Hoping he falls asleep very soon so the wailing will stop. And I hope that he learns a lesson from this.

Happy New Year!

Twenty-eleven (or two thousand and eleven) is here! We rang in the New Year with fireworks and Rock Band and perhaps one too many Cosmos (Ash pours with a heavy hand).

I have some new goals for this year:

1) De-clutter house and pare down belongings (I won't say we have "too much stuff" as that is Stephen's mantra, but I will say that I do have a lot of things that I am hanging onto for sentimental reasons and I think I can let them go. I did that quite a few months ago with a huge rubbermaid tub of sweaters - many of which were over 20 years old. It was fun reminiscing about all of these jewel-toned angora sweaters, where I wore them, when I bought them, etc but I really did not see myself ever wearing them again so off they went.
2) Exercise! I haven't exercised at the gym regularly in a long time. Much of it had to do with the shoulder pain I had. PT has helped immensely but I wonder if the chronic ache is just something that I will have to live with as I really do not want to be on anti-inflammatory indefinitely. Anyway, as part of this goal is to train for the Rock'n'Roll 1/2 Marathon in June. I am doing the walk/run portion so no plans to have to run the whole 13 miles. Wish me luck!
3) Read. It seems that I barely read any books this year outside of book club books. I do read a lot (I am a news junkie and am constantly reading/viewing MSNBC, CNN, The Star, King5, as well as sites like Huffington Post and Gawker.com. However, these do not seem to be measurable reads. I guess I really should take them into consideration when I think about how much I have read throughout the year.
4) Dinner! With hockey practices 4 nights a week, we have severely slacked in the meal planning/preparation in this house. I think because a lot of the things I make are not make-ahead-type meals that can easily be reheated, it has made it difficult to feed the family short of going to Subway two nights/week. I have a few recipes ready to go so we'll see how this works out. Mostly I am worried about Cars ending up eating cheese sandwiches since he is so picky. And Stephen gets soooo irritated that Cars will not try new things. This will be a challenging goal.

I think those are about all of my goals. I still am thinking about working but less so since I am keeping very busy volunteering at the school. Maybe next fall?

It is just before 11pm on Christmas eve. I am taking a break from wrapping. Merry Christmas to all of my blogsphere friends. I appreciate the few readers and even fewer commenters (commentors?) I have.

Peace on Earth.

Pez

Today is the first day of Christmas vacation, well, "Winter Break" for the kids. I spent the morning baking (and burning) sugar cookies. We'll ice them later. I was planning to make the dough for shortbread cookies next but I am procrastinating.

I am not really in the holiday mood at all. I have left things for what seems like the last minute and am feeling a little overwhelmed. I have a couple of people to buy for still and I have NO idea what to get for them. Aargh. I think I just need to put some Christmas music on and wrap the gifts and that will help.

I have also been eating like there is no tomorrow and have gained a few pounds but what is worse is that I am blubbery! I look (and feel) horrible. Need to fix that stat!

Ok, off to find the shortbread recipe. It is something like a pound of butter and five cups of sugar and five cups of flour. Very healthy.

Pez's Book List

I read a pathetic number of books this year. Ugh!

Pez's 2010 Book List


1. The Sparrow, Mary Doria Russell
2. The Associate, John Grisham
3. Too Much Happiness, Alice Munro
4. The Murderer’s Daughters, Randy Susan Meyer
5. The Gatecrasher, Madeline Wickham
6. Blonde Roots, Bernadine Evaristo
7. Prior Bad Act, Tami Hoag
8. The White Queen, Phillipa Gregory
9. The Immortal Life of Henrietta Lacks, Rebecca Skloot
10. Breakfast with Budda, Roland Merullo
11. Chasing Harry Winston, Lauren Weisberger
12. The Art of Racing in the Rain, Garth Stein
13. Jane Austen Ruined My Life, Beth Pattillo
14. Olive Kitteridge, Elizabeth Stout
15. See Jane Run, Joy Fielding
16. The Lost Symbol, Dan Brown
17. The Home for Broken Hearts, Rowan Coleman
18. Pirate Latitudes, Michael Crichton

I am sitting in a cold arena while Jax is at a power skating class before his regular practice. Yippee for me - I get to spend 2+ hours here tonight. And I have both Dex and Cars with me while Stephen gets to go out for a fancy dinner tonight with his manager (his manager is taking all of his direct reports out). The kids and I had Subway.

I am slowly getting ready for Christmas. I have mailed most of my gifts out that need to be sent. Fortunately we will be going to B.C. after Christmas so I can take up my brother and my niece's gifts then (what's a few days late, right?). I have written about 2/3 of the Christmas cards that I had planned to send out but I am thinking of stopping the rest. I wrote them all for the family, extended family, close friends and I think I might just stop there. Sorry, Dear Reader, if you are one of the ones whom I do not send one out to.

Part of the Bah-humbug is that I bought some really pretty cards at Co$tco that say "Peace on Earth" (which is what virtually ever single card that I have sent out for the past 17 years say). They are the kind where you add a photo so I chose a good photo of the boys and printed off some copies to put in them. They are substantial and I thought they looked great. However, in my mom's and my in-laws, (and one of my aunts and one of Stephen's aunt's, etc), I put in a couple of extra photos that I thought they would like and the envelope seemed a little heavy so I had to have it weighed at the post office. They were over 2 ounces! First class postage (up to one ounce) to Canada is $0.75. These suckers cost me $2 and UP! The ones with one additional photo cost $1.00. The weight without an extra photos was exactly 1 ounce (not counting labels and stamps!). I am now concerned that the 40+ of those ones will come back to me stamped INSUFFICIENT POSTAGE. I did also have some pretty cards that were not quite as heavy so I ended up using those too and I am good with the postage on them.

We bought our Christmas tree at Co$tco too. We had such great luck with one last year so we thought we'd do it again. For $39.99 we got a 8'8" tree that is over 9' tall with the spire topper. The lights were tricky to get on because we had to use a 6' ladder and the ladder step stool. Then the kids and I put up all of the decorations and tinsel and it looks fantastic! However, we completely forgot to saw off a bit on the end and it is not sucking up any water! Dex was in charge of watering it the first couple of days and failed to tell us that it needed virtually no additional water. I am now afraid to turn the lights on and I hope it lasts until Christmas!

I haven't done any Christmas baking either. Jax has asked for sugar cookies and of course Stephen will make Nanaimo bars and caramel corn. Stephen and Jax also gobbled up the Christmas cake from my mom so I had her send me the recipe and I might make more. I also want to make shortbread cookies (although my sugar cookies have nearly as much butter and sugar that they are almost like shortbread).

Anyway, tomorrow I am teaching Art in Dex's class (we'll make 3D Snowflakes. I made them in Jax's class last year and it was...interesting. Some of the kids were really into it and some HATED it. We'll see how this class does. These kids are also a year younger so not yet smug tweens.

Dex told me yesterday that he was "all better" and didn't need to go to counseling anymore. I told him to talk to his therapist about it so he did bring it up at his appointment last night. It was decided that for the next few weeks he will go every other week and then in mid-January we'll decide if he needs to keep going. He is doing really, really well. He hasn't fallen apart in many, many weeks. Stephen is a bit concerned about how baseball season will be. We've even thought about not registering him this year and finding another sport that might suit him better. The problem is that he really likes baseball even though he, quite frankly, sucks at it.

Actually, he doesn't suck. He did last year because he was so anxious and worried about striking out that he would strike out (would strike out staring at the ball, not even swinging). And again iin the field. You could see the terror in his eyes when the ball came to him - he was so scared that he would drop the ball that he would. It was so heartbreaking and so painful to watch. Anyway, registration ends this weekend so we'll have to make a decision by Sunday night.

I must stay away from Starbucks Salted Caramel Hot Chocolate - OMG they are so good but a billion calories. I have had three of them in less than two weeks. Well, four if you count the one that I tried to make at home (was not good).

I heard that Weight Watchers was kicking off a new program right after Thanksgiving. I should probably look into it. Actually, I just need to get back to the gym. I haven't been since the end of September. My shoulders are so bad that it was nearly impossible for me to do the circuit training class. I am now taking anti-inflammatory medication and going to PT to try to fix my shoulder problems (there are two - thoracic outlet syndrome and tendinitis / bursitis). I am so old! Wah!

I am watching "The Oprah Show". It is the final "Favorite Things" episode. I thought I would be envious of all of the things that she is giving out but really I am just so excited for all of these people! How cool would that be to be there.

I spent much of today thinking that it was tomorrow which has thrown me completely off.

I did have a big to-do list today which included running many errands. The first was to the car dealership to have a recall installed in my vehicle. The recall was actually just software but very important software called Smart Stop technology so my car will stop in the event of SUA when I frantically depress the brake. Ok, my car will NOT experience SUA as Toyota claims it is always driver error but just in case, I get this updated software to my car. Anyway, before I went I was told it would take 30 minutes to install. One hour and forty minutes later I was still waiting because they had problems with three different computers when trying to install it in my vehicle. This did not make me overly confident. Anyway, the forth time was the charm apparently and nearly two hours after I arrived, I drove away in my now safer car. I wanted to depress the gas and brake at the same time to ensure that the software worked but I was afraid so I didn't.

Anyway, so I had budgeted 45 minutes for the 30 minute install which took nearly 2 hours. So I had to scratch a few things off my list but I still wanted to go to Co$tco. I went to the one that I do not normally go to and it is all screwed up! The aisles are not the same as the aisles as *my* Co$tco. Although, it might be my Co$tco that is screwed up because this one I went to is virtually identically set up to the one we visit in Richmond, BC when we go to Vancouver... Anyway, I could not find the items I needed and I was in a time crunch so I left without frozen waffles and a massive jar of kalamata olives.

I rushed home, (oh but not before I dropped off our boogie boards to my friend who heads to Hawaii tomorrow - I would say I am jealous but that would be an understatement) threw a few things away then rushed off to a guitar lesson which ended just as the elementary school let out. My kids do not take the bus home on Wednesdays so I rushed to pick them up at the park then back home to put the rest of the groceries away, help with homework then off to Dex's guitar lesson (a double lesson at a non-regular time) then off to Subway for dinner (I rock as a mom) and then to Jax's hockey practice.

Big breath.

Now it is 10 pm, Jax is still up doing homework. Stephen is still at work and I do still have a few things from Co$tco which need to be put away. And today is still Wednesday, not Thursday.

I spent the day at the school today, volunteering for the Vision and Hearing screening. It was so cute to see the little kindergartners come in and try to make an E with their fingers to point it the right way. Wow - is it really just two years since Cars was that little?? I guess there is a huge difference between 5 and 7 years of age.

One of the other volunteer moms mentioned that some 5th grade boy was staring at her face and she asked him why and he said "I am trying to figure out if you have had plastic surgery". When she told this story everyone was surprised but I was silently horrified. I had told Spy recently that I thought this mom had had Botox in her forehead and around her eyes and I was scared that perhaps Dex had overheard me and it was him who had said that to her. However, I realized that it had not been him and then I figured that I am not the only one who has noticed the changes in her and perhaps the mom of that other 5th grader had said something in front of him about it. The change in her look is pretty dramatic. Doesn't take perfect vision to notice.

On Friday, I went to Nordstrom's to check out their Women's and Children's sale. I found a couple of sweaters that I liked so I bought them. They were both less than $50 so I thought they were a great deal! I was so happy with them until I tried them on for Stephen.

I put the first one on - it was blue and was a little flowy. He told me that I looked "frumpy" in it. So I took it off and put it back in the bag to return. I tried on the second one which I thought looked so nice on me in the store. Stephen looked at me and said "Are you *trying* to look 65"? So, that went back in the bag too and I took them back to Nordstrom's tonight. At least returning them was easy enough. They ask "Is there anything wrong with them or did they just not work for you"? Glad I did not have to tell them I was returning them because my husband thinks I look frumpy.

Stephen has taken Cars to his hockey game this morning. I stayed home with Dex and Jax so that they could sleep in. Dex had a sleepover with Cam the other night and he has been moody and whiny since. Jax loves sleeping in whenever he can because he gets up every morning during the week at 6:15am.

It is strange to have Jax sleep in though because he was my one kid who fought sleep every night and woke up about 5:45 every.single.morning until he was about 7 years old (then he started getting up about 6:30 every.single.morning). One thing though, he will be up by 9 at the latest. I wonder if he will ever be the kind of teen who'd sleep until noon if we let him.

My Wizard Friends

* * * Possible Spoiler Alert re: HP7 * * *

I just finished re-reading "Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows". I am very excited about the movie coming out on the 19th. I will take Jax with me. Dex will be going to see it in early December at a birthday party he has been invited to. Cars would prefer to see it on DVD so he can fast-forward past any scary parts. Stephen has no desire to see it at all.

I am not ashamed to admit that I cried while reading the book (both times). But(spoiler alert!) I did not cry at first when I read that Fred had died. I cried for Neville's bravery the most. I was so proud of him. Remember what a poor, fumbling boy he was at the beginning of this whole journey?

JK Rowling is a brilliant writer. I love that things introduced many books before re-enter in subsequent books and it is not as though it was contrived or added as an afterthought. Just brilliant story-telling. I love that the hero is flawed. I love that he acts completely like a teenager when he is one. Harry is not really wise beyond his years although he has been through a lot. I like him and I am happy to know him. In fact, I almost consider him a friend. Most of the characters actually. I like Hermione's brains and her determination. I like Ron's goofiness and that he is almost an accidental hero because he is Harry's bff. I love Mrs. Weasley ("Not my daughter, you BITCH!") and Bellatrix LeStrange's cruel streak. And I love how Dudley told Harry that he didn't think he was a waste of space (another tearful moment for me). And I love Snape. Oh, how I did hate him after he killed Dumbledore (anyone but Snape!) but it was all resolved in the end, my heart ached so much for him. However, despite it all, I do think it was a stretch that Harry named his son after Severus. Really?

Anyway, these characters...no, friends, will always stay with me. I have gotten to know them so very well over the past decade and will miss them. I am glad that I will be able to visit them whenever I like, though. Just by reaching out to my bookshelf.

As I put the dusk jacket back on my book and placed my book back on the bookshelf, I chuckled as I saw that my hardback copy of HP7 was nearly as thick as my collection of the first three in paperback. I am glad that they have split the 7th book into two movies. I just wish that I did not have to wait so long for the final installment.

I have done a good job of not volunteering in the past couple of weeks. While I have agreed to work all day next week at the Hearing/Vision clinic, I waited two days when the call came out for production (photocopying) work and by then the calendar was already filled. :) I am teaching Art Start next week in both Dex and Cars' classes but it is easy work and something that I really enjoy doing.

I was cleaning out my email inbox and deleted several notes in regards to the school's walk-a-thon that took place last month. It was a great success but I know that I do not want to be a part of it next year. Please help me remember that in May when they start recruiting.

Jax and Cars had their hockey pictures done yesterday. The package we chose included "trading cards" which list the player's stats (age, height, etc). I wasn't sure how tall the kids were so I measured them. Cars is 4'5". Wow! And Jax? He is 5'5"! I am 5'6". I realized on Halloween it seemed that I was looking UP to him when I was chewing him out for running ahead and leaving Dex behind but I thought it was just the hat he had on that made him appear taller. He has grown slightly over 2 inches since July! I just measured Dex and he is 4'11".

I found a website that shows the growth percentiles for children (http://www.nutropin.com/tools-resources/evaluation/growth-percentile.jsp). (FYI, it is a website for a growth hormone for kids). Anyway, it shows Dex and Jax to be in the 90-95th percentiles for their age and Cars is off the charts!

I was walking been some teenagers in Safeway the other day and these boys where HUGE! All three of them well over 6 feet tall. Made me wonder if that will be my kids too. Stephen is 6 feet but youngest brother is 6'4". I guess if the chart is any indication, they will be all be at least 6' tall.

Stephen bought Kinect for the boys today. It is way more fun than I thought it would be. The boys got sweating "running" around playing so I am happy to let them play more video games. :)

One year ago today, my friend Shelly passed away. She died suddenly and it was quite a shock to read about her death on her facebook page (her son had written it).

Anyway, to honour her and her love for The Beatles and Disneyland, a number of us got together and purchased a pave way stone at Disneyland and had it inscribed. Memorial stones are not allowed - you are only to commemorate your visit to Disneyland really so it took a while to convince Disney folks that Shelly's last name really was Love.

Our very crappy Bummer Summer seems to have suddenly decided to arrive today, only 4 and a half months late. It was 75 degrees and sunny today! We broken records for hottest November 3rd on record as well as hottest November day ever.

The afternoon was quite breezy but the incredible thing was that the breeze was warm, like a Chinook. The dry leaves on the ground were rolling like waves across the park today. Some of the trees were dropping leaves like rain in the wind too. It was a glorious day!

My mom is settled nicely into her apartment and so relived to no longer be a homeowner. She said everyone in her building is so nice. There is a walkway between her building and the next that leads to a beautiful park with many architectural features/sculptures. Now that the trees have lost their leaves, she has a beautiful view of Lake Ontario, too.

I am sorry that I did not get to see her apartment while I was there but we'll probably go for a visit next summer so I can see it then. She keeps saying that there is room for us to stay with her (um, no, you live in a 1 bedroom apartment!!) but it is nice of her to offer.

And in a weird twist, Stephen's cousin (whom he has not spoken to in about 20 years) lives directly across the hall from my mom.

November again

Three years ago this weekend, we moved into our new home. We are just 3/10 of a mile from our old house (straight down the street and turn left).

One thing that was a change for us at this house is that we are on a septic system. As a result, I stopped using a garborator (garbage disposal) because I read that it fills up the septic tank quickly.

So now it is time to get our septic tank pumped and wow, what an ordeal. So far I have dug a 3'x2'x2'deep hole in my garden. I managed to locate one lid (I vaguely remembered where the garden was dug up when we came for the inspection) but apparently there are two that need to be uncovered. I have no idea where any of the paperwork that we received when we bought the house is (I have searched in the past and haven't found it). Anyway, the septic guy is coming on Friday so if I manage to find it before then I hope to have it dug up and if not, I will be paying him $90/hour to do it. Aargh!

BTW, Stephen will have nothing to do with the digging and he is happy to pay the guy the money rather than dig out there. I am thinking if that's the case, I will take the $$ that I save by digging myself and treat myself to a new purse... Or, spend that money and install risers on the septic tank so we never have to dig again.

Volunteers Anonymous

Last school year, Ash gave me this magnet and we laughed and joked about it. This year, I should have looked at it again. I have over committed myself and I am mad at myself! Aargh!

I am teaching Art in Dex and Cars' classes. I am also doing production work (photocopying/laminating) twice a month for the school (any teacher), I am co-room mom in Cars' class (think party planning), I have volunteered for the health room (applying bandaids and ice packs when kids get hurt during recess or at lunch), I did work on the walkathon which is over for the year, I have volunteered to help with the vision/hearing screening as well as provide food for luncheons for teachers at both the elementary school and junior high. On top of that, I have volunteered to sub in Dex's religion class because the teacher is in the hospital. WTF am I thinking? What about time for me to work out, clean my house, grocery shop?? Aargh!

Please, someone stop me before I volunteer again!

I went to Toronto for four days this past week. My mom sold her house and she is moving to an apartment. I went to help her pack, to go through three boxes of things that I still had there and also to say good-bye to the house and the street and the neighbourhood.

My mom had done much of the packing already. Her biggest chore was going through keepsakes that my dad had received during his 30+ year career as a politician. Tons of plaques and certificates and photos honouring him or commemorating some event. My mom found it hard to throw away photos of my dad, even if it were a photo of him standing beside a delegation of Greek officials in Scarborough's sister city in Greece. Or with some community leaders at an Art Night or at the opening of a new factory or warehouse or whatever. Apparently she has a whole Rubbermaid tote box filled with these types of photos in storage now that "you kids can deal with when I'm gone". She did take them all out of the frames and dropped the frames off at the Value Village near her home.

My mom told me that there were three boxes of things that I had to go through before she moved. When I got "home" though, there were actually 4 (five if you count a small box that had gift in it). The first box held my collection of music boxes. I had collected them as a teen and young adult. I am not even certain how many there were altogether - probably 20. I carefully unwrapped each one, wound it up and listened to them before I wrapped them back up and returned them to the box to be dropped off at Value Village. Some I had almost no memory of receiving or buying but others brought back the memories of the giver or the occasion in which they were received. Some of the music boxes were so pretty sounding (while others were not) and some looked lovely and some were down-right creepy (a stuffed clown with a music box in him - ~shudder~). I chose four small ones to keep. Well, two for me (they were the prettiest sounding) and two for my two nieces who live in the Toronto-area. I told my mom we'd drop the rest off at Value Village and she was horrified! "But they are your music boxes!" I know but I was not going to lug them home and Stephen did not want them in our house and besides, there is no place in my home to display them. "Fine", she said "I'll keep them!". What?? We actually argued over those music boxes. Boxes that were not hers, that she insisted I deal with yet when I did, she decided that she had better plans for them (to be kept in her storage unit until she dies and I have to deal with them yet again).

*sigh*

Another of the boxes held some gifts, a few of which were wedding gifts (oops!). Some crystal candle holders, a crystal vase, a crystal candy dish, a serving dish what was silver-plated, a thermos coffee server and a few other items including a gorgeous crystal basket that weighed a ton! I did not keep any of those things - again, I decided to take them to Value Village and my mother would not hear of it! In the end, she kept the coffee server and crystal basket, we gave the candy dish to one of her neighbours and Ramona took the rest to sell at a garage sale in the spring. For some reason, that was less offensive to my mom (selling them at the garage sale) than taking them to Value Village. In fact, my mom was so delighted that Ramona was going to take them that my mom quickly donated many other boxes of items to Ramona's garage sale that her car was packed to the gills when she left my mom's house!

The third box was labeled "Stephen's Life" and it was photos albums and high school yearbooks, awards, keepsakes, books and framed "art". My mom and I spent a couple of hours each peeling the old photos and news clippings out of the albums. I took pictures of Stephen from his yearbook (I wish my mom had a scanner) and we dropped off the empty albums and the rest of them items to Value Village.

There was a fourth box that held *my* grade 9 yearbook; that I brought home; two diaries and my high school diploma as well as some other books. I had a blast this week reading through the diaries. I am a tad bit embarrassed at how dramatic I was (always "so depressed" when boys did not call or like me or whatever). I am horrified at the lack of caring about school (I never did my homework or studied for tests - showed in my grades) because I was busting my hump working at BiWay (a discount store) umpteen hours each week. I would never let my kid work so many hours during the school year! I was making $2.40/hour (it paid more than McDonald's where Ramona and Leah Ann worked for $2.15/hour) and I worked from 5-11 2-3 evenings each week and all day on Saturdays (back then, there was no Sunday shopping). I did not have time for homework or studying! No wonder I did no do it.

Anyway, one of the funniest things in the diary was back in '81, my mom and my aunt went out bought themselves some jeans. My cousin was horrified that women "their age" would wear jeans. My mom was the age I am now! And I wear nothing BUT jeans. Funny how times (and ones perspective) change.

I am happy for my mom that she is moving but sad to say goodbye to that house. It was our home and only our home (my parents were the original owners and they moved there in November 1958). I hope that my mom will be happy in the apartment that she is moving into. It is only 5km from my her old house, a little closer to my aunt's house, close to a little plaza with a grocery store, banks, cafe, and some other little shops. Close to a bus line if she decides she does not want to drive. Right on Lake Ontario so she can stroll along the bluffs and (if she lived on a higher floor), could look out over the lake.

Not going "home" to see Mom will be strange. I mean Toronto, no, Scarborough, will always be "home" but the house was "home" too. All that familiarity and memories inside of things and people that made me who I am. I will miss that.

Eeek!

I hate this time of year with all of the gargantuan spiders around. The bigger ones that get fat and meaty disgust and scare me. If they are outside and I can avoid them, I am ok with them (like this one) but when they are inside the house I hate it! We've had several very large spiders in the house so far this fall. Usually Stephen is around to get them for me but the other day, Dex and I came home from his appointment and there was one, in the hallway, blocking my way into the family room from the laundry room. I didn't know what to do! If I left it for Stephen (who wouldn't be home for another 30 minutes, the spider might disappear...or worse!). And I didn't think I was brave enough to try to kill it myself (what if it turned on me or got away?!).

Dex is as afraid of spiders as I am so he just stood in the laundry room, staring at the beast and paralyzed with fear. I knew then I had to be brave. I leapt over the monstrosity and ran up the stairs to find the fly swatter. My hands were shaking and the adrenaline racing through my body. I crept back down the stairs and with a shriek, swatted the thing so hard that some of its legs fell off. But it was still moving. I shuddered and swatted again and again and again. Finally, it was dead. I used a half dozen Kleenexes to push it onto the end of the swatter and carried it to the toilet and flushed. Then I had to go back and pick up the legs with the Kleenex. ICK!

Gah, I hate those spiders. Really hate them. And if you doubt me about how big these things are, please check out this video. Be warned...it is scary!

The kids had been asking to get their Halloween costumes so we ventured out to a couple of costume and party stores and found what they wanted:

Dex as Demon of War:

Cars as General Grievous:

Jax as a Roman Soldier


Fortunately, no one wanted to be this one:

(nice to see that the woody is included)