I feel a little defeated at the moment. I set up Jax's 504 Plan review for this year and told him about it when he got home from school. He asked me if every kid with a peanut allergy has a 504 Plan. I replied (jokingly, of course) that no, it was just that I loved him more than other parents loved their children. He told me that he did not need it anymore and it was overkill. I asked if he felt that it made him stand out and he said yes!
The thing is, we never have to even deal with the 504 Plan except for the annual reviews now because there have been no issues. But his 504 Plan stopped his 5th grade teacher from using peanut butter in a science lesson. And his 504 Plan allowed him to have a separate desk in 5th grade so he did not have to sit at the shared desk beside the kid who brought in peanut butter for lunch every.single.day.
I feel a little sad about him saying this. I know he is speaking only as a teenager who only sees that it makes him "different" (except that no one even knows except his teachers unless Jax tells them!). All of the fighting that we had to do with the school district to get this 504 plan in place - from the school nurse, school psychologist, principal to the nursing supervisor and risk management lawyers). It was a huge fight - a battle! And it was all for Jax and it feels like he just does not even care about all of that - just how it affects him now.
And logically I know he is a self-centered teenager who does not want to stand out and does not want to seem different. It is bad enough that he has this allergy let alone having a plan at school that labels him as having a "disability". He does not realize all of the acrimony and nasty comments from that friggin school nurse that we had to endure. He does not know all of the hours of research done to prepare for his eligibility meeting. He knows he is a teenager who does not want to be the center of attention.
So I am trying to get over my hurt feelings. And we will go to the meeting and he will sit sullenly and act all embarrassed that I am there but I will know that his teachers will have reviewed his 504 Plan and he will be safe at school.